Quoting InfiniteVengeance,
It was 2v2 Conquest with fast DG respawn.
Um...that's why you got a stalemate. The respawn timers are there for a reason - so after you kill someone you have time to push while they're dead.
I have similar disgust for the innumerable TF2 servers with instant or fast respawn. NO SHIT that no one is ever going to win, when you take 2 minutes to walk to their base and kill someone and they come back in 3 seconds obviously no one is going to get momentum.
OK that wouldn't be a bad point. Fast respawn is definitely going to make it difficult to press a kill advantage in most circumstances. It didn't matter in this case because the enemy didn't kill us anymore once we turtled. I guess I didn't make it clear with this part:
During that fifteen minutes it's worth noting that our income and xp far, far exceeded that of our opponents, because we stopped feeding kills. It's much harder to kill someone when there's only one way to get to them and they are sitting in front of four buffed towers. On the other hand you have a long, long walk back to safety if something goes wrong.
In any case, you are right that I shouldn't have used that game as the example because respawn timing clouds the issue.
The problem is that this was the first game I ever played on Crucible with fast respawn, but I have seen these trends on bottleneck maps since before release.
Let's scratch anecdote though, since that approach apparently doesn't hold water with the pros, and look at very rough average game time of maps per the Pantheon page:
Cataract - 31.5 Min
Crucible - 34 Min
Exile - 35.5 Min
Leviathan - 29 Min
Prison - 27 Min
Mandala - 30 Min
Brothers - 33.5 Min
Zikurat - 34.5 Min
So all right around the 30 minute mark, and a bit of deviation either way. Let's look at it a bit deeper though -
Of those the top 4 from longest to shortest are Exile, Zikurat, Crucible, and Brothers. I understand why Zikurat and Brothers are up there - they are huge 4v4/5v5 maps with a ton of towers and multiple lanes - even if you have the early advantage and a solid team against newbs it's probably hard to finish a game on Brothers in less than 20 minutes.
But why does a game on Exile last on average 6.5 minutes longer than one on Leviathan? Why does the average game on Crucible last 7 minutes longer than one on Prison? If you could come up with an explanation other than the one I've provided I'd be happy to hear it.
And we don't have access to the tail on those map averages either. (Though, Bara, if you do have access it would be great if you could throw up some numbers to support or destroy the point I'm about to make)
Can you imagine a game on Prison lasting 60 minutes? Maybe. If the teams were just ridiculously well-matched.
What about a 60 minute game on Crucible or Exile? Absolutely, happens all the time, and it has *nothing* to do with matched teams and everything to do with the map strongpoints allowing DGs + Grunts + multiple towers + 5 second walk to Crystal to fight DGs + Grunts + Momentum.
What you'll find is that the momentum evaporates after 5 melted waves or 3 dead DGs. And then it's just a question of how long the turtles will farm you before rolling up the carpet.
Full circle to spawn timers - the only way to beat a turtle team who knows what they are doing is to kill enough of them at the same time that you have a numerical advantage and can consolidate the position before they respawn. Offense on these maps is always at a disadvantage though, and a turtle team can heighten that.
Heal Sedna, HoL Shield Oak, Tower Rook, Stamina UB, Speed Reg with Mines/Mark, Bramble QoT, Mistswarm Erebus, and AoE Ice TB are all strong defensive builds. You are going to have a really tough time killing any of those in even numbers, let alone when they are supported by 4 towers, minions, and their own grunts.
Personally I prefer a 15 minute game to a 90 minute one, and I think the difference is map design.
PS Meta - I look forward to reading your posts on balance. And Neovain, no, no it isn't anything like that.