I've been inspired to start my own video game company!

By playgroundlegend on November 6, 2009 11:51:56 PM from

I think I found my new calling. I'm going to make video games:

Attention everyone: I am proud to announce Celestial Guardians of Montaku.

It's a real time strategy game where you can play with your friends and save the land of montaku by battling in multiplayer arena's. It's on sale.... give me money now....... oh so you bought it? I guess it's time for me to fill you in on something. In case you haven't noticed we've received reports that your game might crash and there might be instability - over here at my company we have not experienced such issues, it must be your computer or your ISP. Oh? you have a top of the line core i7 dual gtx 295's in SLI and verizon fios the fastest residential internet on the planet and you can play crysis multiplayer maxed out? Well, my game runs fine, sorry to hear about your problems.

What's that? You're saying you wanted match making so you can find people to play with who are at an appropriate skill level as you? Well we don't quite have that, but you can find your own games and find your own players and host it yourself. Whats this I hear? You bought the game so you could play it with your real life friends but the community frowns upon such a thing even though ITS ONE OF THE MAJOR SELLING POINTS YOU READ ON THE DESCRIPTION OF OUR GAME FROM OUR WEBSITE? Well, we advertised it as such, and it wouldn't be a problem if we had an arranged team ladder, but instead we gave you the freedom to control your own games, isn't that neat!

There aren't enough people playing the game and no one wants to play you because you played more than 100 games? Hmmmmm, here.... have a $20 off coupon. Use it to trick someone you hate into wasting their cash, or you can buy MORE of my useless crap product so you have a fresh account and everyone will think you're a noob and might play with you, but most likely not because no one likes a noob. Then we will take this cash and funnel it into our next cluster fuck *cough* I mean title that we will proudly support and sell to you as soon as it's done (and by done I mean we can put in a box, and the installer puts a bunch of files on your hard drive).

If I find out that unhappy customers are trolling my forums with complaints I have an automated posting bot - codename Zehdon - that I use to answers the trolls. I'd pay a person to do it, but that would just mean that I would have less money for the empire club.

You're aware, of course, that both Starcock and Ass Powered Games aren't exactly Fortune 500 companies? They're both independant companies, not cogs in a massive corporate entity, owned by anyone other than themselves and survive off of keeping their customers happy. If you're going to try and insult a large group of people, please do so using correct facts. You failed to mention Heywood Jablowme's Porche and made no direct reference to Joey Baggaladouchia's mansion. Not only are you a worthless human being, you're also a worthless troll.

I, for one, have never seen this error you feel the need to post about in every thread, topic and board you direct your web browser too. I'm sorry you're having an issue, I really am, but instead of moaning like the worthless little toad that you apparently are, how about you suck it up and play something else. You've already paid for Demigod, so it's not going anywhere. Between injecting yourself with Red Cordial and your ADHD medication, learn some patience. Frankly, I'm tired of reading your posts. If the issue was really as bad as you say it is then you wouldn't be posting on the forums at all, you'd have uninstalled the game and moved on to something else. Instead, for some reason, you feel the need to remind everyone that YOU'RE HAVING A PROBLEM.

This thread merely cements the fact that you're a moron and provides a clear demonstration that, somehow, your sheer stupidity always finds a way to ooze from your infant-like mind for no reason other than to be an annoying little skid mark on this community. Don't like what I've written? Don't like the game? Can't help yourself from being a whiney little bitch? Then fuck off. No jokes, no kidding, no more rants; leave.

www.celestialguardiansofmontakuthegame.clownpenis.someonereallytookdemigod.com/wtf/srsly?

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Gaming is the new wall street, home of the new ponzi scheme. Sell a game at full price with half the features cutting costs, use that money to fund a new game, find a way to implement downloadable content... repeat. The only difference between a ponzi scheme and gaming companies now adays is that with a ponzi scheme at least you can get your money back before the fraud is found, whereas in gaming once you give your money up it's gone.

Disclaimer: I'm stuck studying for exams and wished I could take a break and play a game of demigod, if I could I wouldn't have bothered writing this. Didn't like what I wrote? Too bad, at least the forums provide me with a source of entertainment. And if you really don't like it you can go suck a ........... INVALID GAMESTATE ERRORZZZZAZZAC

CRASHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

+10 Karma | 12 Replies

Isn't this supposed to be in off topic? Why are you posting on the Demigod forums when you can post your CGoM forums?

Btw, I bought your game but it's stuck on the spash screen. Here's a screen shot:

I can empathize with you.

go play HoN or something. invalid game state is not a game error its an exploit.

GPG/Stardock aren't after your money. There's no dlc, and all the features that they wanted in are there. All the things you are naming Stardock didn't want to implent coz they dint hink its importnat coz you know they're a sinlgeplayerdevelopert

Not everyone is blizzard.

Quoting lifekatana,

reply 3

go play HoN or something. invalid game state is not a game error its an exploit.
GPG/Stardock aren't after your money. There's no dlc, and all the features that they wanted in are there. All the things you are naming Stardock didn't want to implent coz they dint hink its importnat coz you know they're a sinlgeplayerdevelopert

since i´ve read your first post in the forums some months ago, i´ve wondered how one person alone is able to post as much crap as you do all the time. all you ever post is crap and/or nonsense, isn´t it?! its not happening often that you can watch someone posting bullshit every time he opens his mouth...

Quoting SyDaemon,

reply 1

Isn't this supposed to be in off topic? Why are you posting on the Demigod forums when you can post your CGoM forums?

Btw, I bought your game but it's stuck on the spash screen. Here's a screen shot:

Reduced 79%Original 532 x 555

Well, we here at ass powered games are sorry to hear about the crash. It will be addressed in the next patch.

I kinda agree with this post, the amount of bugs in this game is just sad.

Also there is no support at all. Posts on these forums get ignored for days before you finally get an answer, if you even get one at all.

People can host crap games like 'This game will die in a month.' I'm sure a lot of you have seen the game, it was up for about two or three days before it finally disappeared, the guy probably got tired of having Demigod on his screen and just exited the game, I'm pretty sure it wasn't someone from Stardock who closed the game.

What a worthless thread from a worthless individual.

quoting post

So you're telling me that you're bored of playing the same 3 maps over and over again with only half the cast as viable options for a successful game. I see. Well, I'd make new maps but im too busy sliding hundy spots down a hookers ass crack with the money I got for making the game..... here.... take this... it's modding tools, go make your own maps, I got boobies to fondle.

You're aware, of course, that both Stardock and Gas Powered Games aren't exactly Fortune 500 companies? They're both independant companies, not cogs in a massive corporate entity, owned by anyone other than themselves and survive off of keeping their customers happy. If you're going to try and insult a large group of people, please do so using correct facts. You failed to mention Brad Wardell's Porche and made no direct reference to Chris Taylor's mansion. Not only are you a worthless human being, you're also a worthless troll.

Quoting ntropy,

reply 4

Not everyone is blizzard.

What does this mean? Blizzard wasn't always Blizzard, they were once a smaller company that got big by doing things right. Just because GPG isn't Blizzard doesn't excuse the way parts of this game was done, it just shows that ten years from now when some other game company drops the ball someone like you won't be saying "cut them some slack, they're not GPG."

Zehdon, with your permission i would like to add yoru response to my automated response system any time someone has a problem with my game, that message will be sent. I think its perfect, I hereby extend you an offer to be my company's PR person. I can't pay you in cash, but I have a lot of $20 off coupons.

Interested?

Quoting ZehDon,

reply 8

Neither was Bernie Madoff or Crazy Eddie's. You're an accountant, you should know that. Speaking of which, shouldn't you be preparing for year end audits? Now that I see that you waste company time on video game forums I'm not sure if I can still hire you.

EDIT:

I decided to outside the position to Dubai, is there nothing these guys won't do for cheap?

Bahahaha! I love it.

I think there would have been fewer complaints if it wasn't a $40 game.

Quoting playgroundlegend,

reply 10

$20.00 off coupons is an acceptable payment method, assuming your company produces more than one title before going backrupt. Now, are they cumulative, and is that AU$20.00, or a different currency?

Quoting playgroundlegend,

reply 10

Well, it's actually the weekend here so I'm hardly wasting company time, but I like that you thought of that. And the end of financial year is July, and tjose audits have been completed. Our Trust audits begin in February, so I have more than enough time to post here and do my job.

In any case, Bernie Madoff duped people by creating a large entity for the purposes of concealing the inevitable destination of the funds he was given; the blame rests with him and the people he worked with, he was hardly a sole operator regardless of the portrail the media shows. Brad Wardell, Chris Taylor and any combination of their employees don't equal fraud on any level; you paid for a game and you got it. Madoff took peoples money to invest it, used some of the money to create the facade it had been invested, and spent the rest. As different as you and me, my friend.

Quoting playgroundlegend,

reply 10

I decided to outside the position to Dubai, is there nothing these guys won't do for cheap?

Most international Accounting firms are familar with the Accounting laws of their own country and the United States, very few specalise in Australian regulations and legislation; enjoy being audited, charged with tax fraud, fined and sentenced.

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I've been inspired to start my own video game company!